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Updated: Mar 15

Are you overstuffed with all the holiday gobbling about gratitude? Tired of hearing reminders that gratitude is the best thing since mashed potatoes and gravy? Are you treating gratitude dutifully, like eating your vegetables, knowing it's good for you but secretly yearning for pumpkin pie?

Well, relax. I’m not going to cram you with tributes about the power of gratitude or insist that you crank out three things you are grateful for each day.

Yes, an attitude of gratitude is important and beneficial, but there are some caveats to keep in mind. Faking it, forcing yourself to feel something by denying something else, feels good for a moment but works temporarily at best. As with all spiritual bypass techniques, eventually the real truth oozes out like your waistline the day after that Thanksgiving feast.

Turning gratitude into a “should” rather than from an authentic place only serves a side-dish of guilt.

When my husband had an unforeseen, massive stroke eight years ago, I tried hard to walk my spiritual teacher talk, trying to immediately get to a place of gratitude. I self-talked the standard tactics – well, it could have been worse, at least he didn’t die – but it was impossible to convince myself or stay grateful for long.

Honestly, I felt like a complete victim. Not a drop of gratitude while sitting in that Why Me place.

Giving myself some grace, I allowed a smorgasbord of emotions to be felt until they were done. I wallowed in self-pity for a while, stumbled around in fear and even felt hopeless at times.

Doing all that, I continued delving inside, trying to understand the Bigger Picture. I went to places I had never ventured previously. Subconscious memories were exposed showing me that it was time to clean up things I had carried over from several prior lifetimes.

The onslaught of emotions quelled; puzzle pieces were put together. My inner evolution was put into hyperdrive, and true gratitude flowed effortlessly. Feelings of self-worth flourished, and things I had fantasized about for years came true. I found a perfect home in the mountains where I learned what it meant to truly care as my husband’s caregiver.

This story is to remind you that if you are not feeling gratitude yet, don't try to rush it. Allow yourself to feel whatever you are feeling. Trust that gratitude will come when you are ready to see and understand the higher consciousness reasons why. Know that everything you go through is assisting your evolution, even if you don’t know how.

Authentic gratitude is knowing that you love yourself so much that you chose a life of challenges to remember who you are. Others love you so much that they volunteered to co-create situations to help remind you.

Although I promised no gratitude assignments, I lied. Once a day, stop what you’re doing, look in the mirror. Sincerely thank the person looking back at you for something, big or small or for no reason at all. You’ve made it through whatever challenges you chose in this life. You are cleaning up things you didn’t even know needed to be cleaned.

For a moment, know that everything is working for your highest good, and you are assisting this planet in its global evolution toward love. We all are.

Feeling grateful from your heart not your head reorients you to life's Truth. It reminds you that in this tumultuous world there is always something to appreciate. It triggers the part of you that already feels grateful remembering the perfect choices you made in this life.

Now, go fill your tummy with some gratitude pie. You have earned it!

(Here is my favorite quote about gratitude: "If the only prayer you ever say is thank you, it will be enough." - Meister Eckhart)


Royce Morales is a renowned spiritual trailblazer who has been teaching her innovative approach to inner transformation for decades. She developed Perfect Life Awakening, a spiritually based program, to take you from triggered to empowered!

Royce hosts "The Perfect Life Awakening Show" on Om Media, first and third Wednesdays of the month at 9:00 a.m. PT.

Perfect Life Awakening provides tools to discover and resolve sources of subconscious, self-sabotaging inner programming. This profound work brings enlightenment down to earth and unlocks the door to your highest potential.

If you are struggling to find joy, meaning and self-love, this inner adventure can shift your consciousness, awaken you to a life of deservingness, and connect you to your authentic self.

Royce offers in person and remote group classes and private inner journey sessions using her empowering spiritual clearing techniques.

Subscribe to Royce's YouTube channel where she shares enlightening information about her empowering, spiritually-based teachings!

Royce is the author of three fascinating books about her teachings:

“Want: True love, past lives and other complications” explains the eternal connection of soulmates and the lessons that arrives from them.

“Know: A Spiritual Wake-Up Call” details in a step-by-step way, Royce's profound teachings that help you get in touch with who you really are by getting to the root of self-sabotage. Read more here.

“Back: Rebirth After Stroke” is Royce's personal spiritual journey after her husband's stroke that will help you through any traumatic event.

All Royce's books are available on

Her website is and Twitter is @RoyceMorales.

Her YouTube channel is Royce Morales. Email is

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