While mourning the anniversary of the January 6th insurrection, without warning, a dear friend of mine died. Since she was in remission from cancer and doing great, it was unexpected. As one who proudly proclaimed devoted left-wing persuasion, this was surely her final political statement.
The saying is true that death is hardest on the living. Although as a spiritual teacher I have no doubt that her spirit lives on, my humanness took over. I experienced the standard stages of grief – from denial and shock to sadness, anger, depression and finally acceptance. I know enough to not resist those stages, so I got through them rather quickly.
Why is death so tough on us humans? Seems we should be more comfortable with it since it is not our first rodeo, at least if reincarnation is a certainty. Sadly, we block out memories of those repeated endings to focus all our attention on preserving this current existence.
Losses, especially deaths, are upsetting because they happen without our consent and conscious approval. They trigger fear of change as well as believing we will not be okay minus what this person symbolized to us. Ultimately, death brings up fear of our own mortality, with a haunting concern that we did not fulfill why we chose to be here.
An ongoing higher consciousness lesson we are here to learn is to know there truly is no loss. Forms change, but energy never goes away. It can’t. Simultaneously, we must honor our humanity by not denying or suppressing our emotions, going through and completing those grief stages.
Thinking about my friend’s death, I feel a sense of completion. There was nothing I held back in our relationship, nothing to feel guilty about. I learned all the spiritual lessons I was supposed to learn from her, and, if there are more, I trust they will reappear in some form.
I loved her like a chosen sister. I miss her biting sense of humor, her inclusivity, her intellectual prowess and compassionate energy. Yet I know she was not the source of my happiness – that comes from within.
Her death reminded me of another spiritual task we are here to master: To know we are temporarily inhabiting these bodies and to let go of our attachment to this physical realm. Life constantly tries to help us with that through the losses we experience, small or large.
My friend’s two adult sons shared an amazing story about their mother’s death. Shortly after she died, they lovingly washed her body and shampooed her hair, an attribute she considered her crowning glory. Afterwards, they gently placed her back in bed and left the room. When they came back in later, there she was, a smile radiating her face.
Even though my friend’s death was a shock, I know she is flashing an ongoing smile, showing off her gorgeous hair, and making sure we know she will always be with us.
Especially on January 6th.
Love you sis.
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Royce Morales is a renowned spiritual trailblazer who has been teaching her innovative approach to inner transformation for decades. She developed Perfect Life Awakening, an empowering program of spiritually-based tools to discover and resolve roots of self-sabotaging, subconscious programming. This profound work brings enlightenment down to earth, and unlocks the door to your highest potential.
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