The dating scene was tough for me. This was prior to the existence of e-harmony providing the ability to pre-qualify and swipe right to find a perfect match.
No matter what I did or how hard I tried, I could never get a relationship to work. Everyone I got involved with would soon drive me crazy. Just as frequently, I would drive them crazy. They would vanish, leaving me sniveling, broken hearted, confused, hopeless.
Looking back on those years, a universal spiritual truth was trying to reveal itself to me: We attract what we are.
It was difficult to admit, but in time I realized that each failed relationship was reflecting an aspect of myself that I did not want to see. Each man I dated was showing me something I was suppressing, avoiding, in denial of. The crazier they drove me, the bigger the mirror being presented.
No matter how much I whined and protested, mirrors never lie: I was attracting what I was.
To add fuel to the fire, I was exposed to the concept of soul mates. Although I was not sure how I would identify him, I began a quest to discover this enigmatic man who would somehow change my life.
Then, he arrived. Every part of me knew he was The One.
Problem was, I chose to ignore a loud inner voice advising that I was not supposed to be with this man romantically. Try as I might, our connection would not work.
I had the romanticized notion that soul mates are supposed to walk arm-in-arm off into the sunset, music fading, credits rolling. Instead, I learned that these other-halves are often magnification mirrors, helping us evolve by using the toughest of tough love.
This man illuminated my lack of self-esteem. He revealed how difficult it was for me to be authentic. He exposed my deepest fears, my disowned shadowed parts. He was an accurate reflection of the toxic relationship I had with myself. I had no idea who I truly was yet expected him to love me.
This soul mate pursuit was a futile attempt to fill in what I believed was missing pieces. I needed him to be the yin to my yang.
What I really needed was to reclaim my denied parts, stop being at war with myself and be the yin to my own yang.
Together, we went on a winding, tortuous journey of awakening. What unfolded was self-acceptance, an opening to know I deserved real love.
Then, the universe provided someone who reflected my wholeness, not my darkness.
By belonging to myself I could be with someone equally committed to our relationship. No longer running from my shadows, I could stand in the light of acceptance.
This process took as long as I needed it to.
And, I would not have been ready to be with my husband a moment sooner.
I thank the universe every day for knowing how to deliver backhanded, uncomfortable, wake-up mirrors. All so I could receive who I truly deserve without needing to swipe right.
Royce Morales is a renowned spiritual trailblazer who has been teaching her innovative approach to inner transformation for decades. She developed Perfect Life Awakening, a spiritually-based program that takes you from triggered to empowered!
Perfect Life Awakening provides tools to discover and resolve sources of subconscious, self-sabotaging inner programming. This profound work brings enlightenment down to earth, and unlocks the door to your highest potential.
If you are struggling to find joy, meaning and self-love, this inner adventure can shift your consciousness, awaken you to a life of deservingness, and connect you to your authentic self.
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Here are some fascinating, informative recent videos:
The Power of Intention
"Listen Up with Royce Morales!" is Royce's monthly radio program that focuses on listening to your intuition, your spiritual knowingness!
She interviews fascinating people who have listened and trusted their intuition in big ways. Airing the fourth Monday of every month at 9:00 a.m. PST on HealthyLife.net.
Royce is the author of three fascinating books about her teachings:
“Want: True love, past lives and other complications” explains the eternal connection of soulmates and the lessons that arrives from them.
“Know: A Spiritual Wake-Up Call” details in a step-by-step way, Royce's profound teachings that help you get in touch with who you really are by getting to the root of self-sabotage.
“Back: Rebirth After Stroke” is Royce's personal spiritual journey after her husband's stroke that will help you through any traumatic event.
All Royce's books are available on amazon.com